The most important part of my morning routine

Before coffee and journaling

My morning routine is a carefully choreographed ritual. Wake up at 6:15AM. Brush my teeth while the kettle heats and the coffee grinds. Drink my morning shake. Make a drip coffee. Journal two pages. Hit the gym.

But the most important part of my morning routine happens before all that.

It’s when I open my eyes, look over, and see Jin sleeping beside me. I take a few quiet heartbeats to feel her warmth. That moment grounds everything else.

When I first realised I was gay in 2016, happiness felt out of reach. I was caught in a thick fog of fear. What would people think? Would my family disapprove? (Spoiler: they did.) I grieved futures I’d always assumed were mine: getting a job back in Indonesia, getting married in the same church my parents did.

In those early days, I had one mental image I clung to. A quiet morning with the sunlight streaming from the outside in. White curtains, white bedsheets. Curled up beside the woman I loved. A slow, perfect, wonderful Sunday.

I don’t see that exact scene every day. Most mornings, the sun isn’t even up when I wake. But I have her. Taking in Jin’s presence calibrates how I go through the day.

She is my chosen family, the one who showed up when others didn’t. Together, we’ve weathered toxic friendships, career pivots, grief and growth. Our life is a quiet rebellion against what the world told us was possible.

The presence of a good partner is a great modulator for bad times and an amplifier of the good ones. We get sad less because it’s shared. We get happy more because it’s multiplied.

The morning pages clarify my thoughts. The coffee wakes me up. But it is waking up next to my fiancée every single morning that tethers me to what is truly important.

Whatever shitty day was going to happen at work, or whatever joyful celebration was going to shoot us up to the moon, I already have what matters most. A warm, cozy, daily reminder.

And one that hates it when I snuggle too tightly that it wakes her up 😅

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Update log:

• 🎨 V2 of Bite-Sized Creativity is done! I’m relieved but also feel like I was forcing myself here and there.

  Camilo Moreno-Salamanca
  is a good editor though and he clocked it immediately

• 🎂 Celebrated my birthday with loads of pastries, hotpot, and… birthday burpees 😅

• 📖 Reading Everything is Tuberculosis by John Green (62% completed)

• 🎞️ Back on shooting film this week. I first felt rusty, but I’m hoping I’ll get some good pics!

• 🎧 Catching up on my fave podcast, Beautiful/Anonymous. It’s always a good day with Geth and the anonymous callers

• ⏺️ determined that the kind of creator i want to be is really a venn diagram of trixie mattel x jenn im x matt d’avella x ali abdaal x kariza santos - which sparked some fun venn diagram replies from my friends

Book a call: Have a bite-sized creative project you want to start? Let’s figure out the systems to get that going. I promise to be your earliest fan - https://calendly.com/beckyisj/

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