How I met my financial advisor
Wrangling my financial anxiety into financial knowledge
On my girlfriend’s 26th birthday, I picked a fight about how expensive the dinner was.
I had already bought a gift, so I didn’t expect to pick up the tab for the meal, too. Instead of being in a joyous mood, I spiralled about my financial shortcomings between bites of black forest cake.
The whole situation was ridiculous. I had a degree in finance and worked a job writing about banks. I knew terms like “discretionary portfolio management” and “currency swaps” but would spend all of my monthly salary.
I was so ashamed about my behaviour that day. I stained my girlfriend’s special day with my own insecurities. Resolute on not having this happen again, I spent the next year wrangling my financial anxiety into financial knowledge.
I binged YouTube videos on personal finance and learned that everyone should have three-to-six months of expenses as cash in the bank. Professors like Scott Galloway talk tirelessly about putting money into index funds. The value of the most well-known index, the S&P 500, historically grows at an average of ~7% each year. I took those words as sacred. I swallowed personal finance books like Morgan Housel’s The Psychology of Money, making connections between my money mentality, spending habits, and sparse savings.
Investing was a big part of personal finance, so I opened an online broker account and put 10% of my monthly salary into the S&P 500 and the Hong Kong equivalent, the Hang Seng Index. I was cautious not to put too much in one place. My father put my college funds into a fintech that went bust after three years and lost it all. After six months, I opened another broker account and put 10% monthly into that one instead. Then I tried newer internet-age brokers that I reported about, like a roboadvisor, which comes up with a selection of investments based on your preferences. I continued on until I had spread my investments into four different places.
Though I was diversified, I didn’t know if I was getting the best fees. I had a suspicion that these online brokers were charging me more fees than traditional financial firms, but I didn’t know how to check. I’ve heard of financial advisors before, but I thought those were reserved for billionaires, people who owned businesses, and trust fund babies.
Until I met one on a hike.
I overheard Jenny talking to my friend Lauren about investments in between inclines and insect bites. A month later, Jenny had offered to walk Lauren through her company’s investment services, but she was too intimidated to go. I was surprised that Jenny has approached Lauren as a potential client since Lauren is not a billionaire, doesn’t own a business, nor is she a trust fund baby (that I know of). Does wealth management extend to regular small potato employees like Lauren and me?
I offered to go with Lauren. I knew Jenny’s company, St James’s Place, was a reputable wealth management firm so I was curious if this may work out for me, too. Jenny was against the duo consultation, saying that usually neither friend would show up with actual numbers because they want to hide that from each other. So I said I’d come with my numbers and Lauren can just observe. Jenny agreed.
This would be my first time outlining all of my investments and savings. Revealing finances has always felt so taboo. These numbers are often bundled up in blankets of judgement. If I have too little, I’m ashamed. If I have too much, I’m abashed and embarrassed. Nothing feels right.
Talking about it can lift that blanket off. If I’m embarrassed and don’t talk about having, say, $50 in my bank account, I will still have that $50. But if I talk about it, I could potentially get advice on what to do about that $50, and maybe even grow it.
In the meeting with Jenny, she explained that her company invests in indexes that align with my risk profile for a 1.5% annual fee. Since I remember Scott Galloway, Morgan Housel, Ramit Sethi, and all these other personal finance experts touting about diversified investments via indexes, I felt comfortable with the investment philosophy that I was signing up for.
Two weeks later, I signed up with Jenny. And just last month, I had my first financial review.
Jenny told me about my investment returns over the past four months and broke down each ticket item. I asked if she had any recommendations on how I can tweak my investment strategy. Since I am not looking to withdraw this money in the next five years, she said I can afford to take on indexes that are slightly riskier, which come with more volatility. I agreed with her, and we adjusted my risk profile.
Having a wealth management account with a financial advisor was not in my 2023 bingo card. It feels unreal, from growing with money being a constraint to knowing that I have enough to create a financially secure future.
Turns out everything, no matter how intimidating, is just a conversation. This one just happens to be about money.
Some resources related to money:
TV show: How to Get Rich (Netflix)
YouTube videos:
How I manage my personal finances as a minimalist by Matt D’Avella
How to Invest for Beginners by Ali Abdaal
Book: The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel
Podcast: The Prof G Pod by Scott Galloway
Internet personalities: Your Rich BFF (EN), Felicia Putri Tjiasaka (ID)
Thank you to friends who helped nudge this essay forward: , , , , and .
Update log:
🎨 Art book progress: I have edited all the scans for the book. Time to start the layouting process.
🏮 Celebrated the lunar new year with friends over food and festivities. Then more festivities on Galentine’s day by going to a carnival with the girl gang.
📖 Reading A Little Life (83% completed). This book is so gripping. Heavy at times but hard to put down.
🍸 Discovered the best espresso martini of my life: cold brew coffee with vodka topped with warm coconut foam. I couldn’t stop thinking about this drink!
✍️ I finished my 400-page journal and started a new one. I’m slowly reading back my entries between March 2023 to February 2024. It’s cringy but I think worth reflecting on.
🖼️ My digital art class instructor said my value structures are “almost there” which made me so proud. I’m back to not knowing how to tackle this week’s assignment on Notan sketches and full-value studies, but I’ll get there.
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Just watch out for those advisor fees :-). 1.5 is a lot. Nick Magiulli has some good writing in this.
Yes to financial independence and yes to A Little Life 👌🏼